The Emerald City

an explanation and an apology

Posted in affection,change,confusion,depression,future,life,relationships by Scaramouche on 30 April, 2007

Sorry I haven’t been posting recently. A lot has been happening. School is a mess. But mostly, the reason I haven’t posted lately is because my grandma’s been sick. Actually… last Tuesday, the 24th of April, she died. Things have been kind of hectic. I’ve been depressed. She was a really big part of my life, and even though I wanted to say something about her, I haven’t been able to.

It was her funeral today. It was a beautiful day. She would’ve loved it. The service was nice, with her favourite hymns. I even played a solo on my flute. The song was “The Last Rose of Summer”. She loved it when I played it for her, and it felt only fitting that I should play it for her then. The acoustics in the church were amazing, and I actually sounded really good. Afterward, so many people thanked me and complimented me. It was the most praise I’ve ever gotten in one day.

She was buried in Greenwood Cemetery, I think. It was a beautiful spot. The funeral procession drove past their house on Cedar Avenue, as she’d requested.

Something interesting happened: When we left the church, I saw this one bird circling around. It followed the funeral procession to the cemetery and watched her being interred, then flew off. It was a hawk, or something that looked like it. Grandma loved birds, and since I believe in reincarnation… I don’t know. But I think that was her. She wanted to see it. She was there. I know it.

So, that’s what’s been happening. Sorry for the lack of updates. I’ll get back on it, guys. I promise. <33 Love you all to bits.

what am I?

Posted in confusion,life,random,religion by Scaramouche on 9 April, 2007

For ages now, I’ve called myself pagan. I’ve said I was a “Celtic polytheist”. It never actually occurred to me that I may not have been right about that.

I am a pagan, I know that. But I am my own unique type of pagan. I don’t fit anywhere. I celebrate pagan religions, like Samhain and Beltane, but… I don’t know. Well, let me outline my real beliefs.

I believe that life is a miracle. Every drop of rain, every stone, every blade of grass is a gift from the gods. I believe strongly in reincarnation, and believe that I myself WAS reincarnated; I have the memories, the emotions, the heart, and the spirit of a wild horse. I believe that God is nature and everything in it. It is in the rain, it is in the trees, it is Everywhere. I believe in being true to oneself, and being who you are inside. I believe that there is more in Heaven and Earth than we could ever possibly be aware of. I believe in balance in nature, and in daily life. I believe in the celebration of life and in the living of each moment as though it were the last.

I don’t know what this makes me. I don’t particularly care to label myself. I am who I am. If that makes me strange, or freakish in some way… so be it.

I don’t swim in your bedroom, please don’t fuck in my pool

Posted in blog,happiness,life,random by Scaramouche on 3 April, 2007

I beg of you, don’t ask.

I’ve noticed that this seems to be the only blog I’ve ever made that I’ve updated with anything even approaching regularity. I think I’ve figured out what it is that makes me update so much. I’ve put a link to the page I update from in my Favourites menu, so it’s really, REALLY easy to get to. No pesky typing involved. Except when I’m typing the entry. So… yeah.

Anything interesting happening? Well, I’m going to see The Phantom of the Opera tomorrow, which will be AWESOME! Watch this space for a review when I get back. =D

I don’t think there’s anything else. Mainly, I just wanted to type out this kickass title.

Well, I hope I shall get a lot more hits. I put a link to this blog in my Myspace blog, and I’ll post a bulletin too. Laterz.

some things

Posted in change,life by Scaramouche on 1 April, 2007

So, yesterday I got a major haircut. It’s really, REALLY short now. Think Keira Knightley in Domino. I look fantastic. I need pictures so that I can show myself off. I do look a bit boyish, but that’s okay. Still good. Still hot. ❤

That’s really all I wanted to say. Back to your lives, citizens.