The Emerald City


he’s leaving home

Posted in change,depression,life,love,relationships by Scaramouche on 1 September, 2008

So, it’s happening. By this time tomorrow, my gentleman friend will be at Wilfrid Laurier University, in Waterloo.

I… words can’t even describe how much this hurts. How much I am going to miss him. I know it’s silly; he’s coming home on Saturday and we’ll see each other, and he’s promised to text me and write. But… still, I feel like I’m losing half of myself. I keep crying randomly, and I don’t *want* to because I know it’s so stupid and illogical. He’ll be home soon, and I’ll see him, and I’ll keep talking to him online, but I miss him, and it’s so fucking hard to let go of him now.

On the 12th of September, it’ll be nine months. By Christmas, it will be one full year. I’ve never been this close to that goal. Before him, my longest relationship was 5 and a half months, and it really ended two months prior to that, we just dragged it on unnecessarily. But, with him… the novelty hasn’t worn off. Every other boy I’ve met has some inherent flaw, preventing me from wanting to be with them. With him, that’s not true. With him, he seems to *have* no flaws. It’s amazing, perfect, too good to be true.

But it is true. And he does love me. For almost nine months he’s loved me, and I can’t see it stopping now, not when we’re closer than ever before, not after everything we’ve been through.

I love him devotedly, and I know he feels the same. Everything is going to be okay.

Please, I just need to believe it today…

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