a letter from the past

27 May 08

Dear Angel,

This is you. Er… me. This is 17-year-old Angel in the year 2008, writing to the Angel I will be in the future. I wonder if I’ll ever look back on these words someday. And I am sure that I’ll read this opening paragraph and not know what the HELL I’m blathering about. I’ll tell you what I’m blathering about, man! (do I still get that reference?)

It is, as noted above, the 27th of May. Today is BEAUTIFUL. The sun is shining with all his might, the clouds are all white and floating lazily, puffily, through the blue sky. The trees are an ecstasy of green. And I’ve decided that it’s true what they say about spring — it is the time when one’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love.

For I am in love. His name is ___ ______. [not for the world to see] His skin is luminous and soft, his eyes are five shades swirled together, his voice is gold, and he writes music in a tapestry of wonder and magnificence. He is my lover in every sense of the word. He is magic.

My reason for writing this letter, then is simple. I am writing to ask if you remember that boy. If you think back on these days with fondness, bitterness, regret, sorrow, anger… hate? I am writing to ask what the end of our story is. Do our dreams come true in the end and send me happily ever after with my Prince Charming? Or do I forget him? Does this love that I treasure more than anything else end up as just one more forgotten photograph buried deep in the cardboard boxes of my memory, one more old boyfriend to scoff at and mock for all his imperfections?

I’m writing you, my future self, to know these things. And, to implore you, never EVER leave this boy. Angel, he is the best thing to ever happen to you and if you leave him then I will kill you.

He is the best thing to ever happen to you. Don’t you DARE let him go. Don’t you DARE.

Love,

Angel.

*delighted gibberish*

This is awesome. Yes, he’s talking about me. Yes, it’s apparently all true. Yes, I want him forever.

Yes. Yes. Yes.

the things I find on old blogs…

This is an entry from a blog I had in Grade 10. That’s 2006. September 19th. Observe:

Oh bother.

Okay. So it turns out that I’ve fallen insanely in love with a Grade 12 in my Vocal class (let’s call him Erik). He’s unbelievable. He’s incredible. He’s amazing. He’s completely oblivious to the fact that I love him devotedly.

His voice is so beautiful. It’s like liquid gold. He’s SUCH a great singer, and he loves musicals, and while he hasn’t seen Phantom (grr) he is allowing myself and others to force him to see it (yay!). He’s also very affectionate, and every time he touches me I blush and turn stupid. Yum. He’s so lovely, and I want him so much, but… gah. Qu’est-ce que le point?

I have, however, made a decision. The day my bestest friend tells her amour that she amours him, I shall tell the same to Erik. Because that will work. Either that, or I shall tell Erik on November the 1st. Whichever comes first. =) But even though that’s months away, I can’t help being nervous about it. I’m so afraid to tell him, to show my true feelings. What if he doesn’t feel the same? Even scarier, what if he DOES??? Is that just wishful thinking, or could it actually happen? I’m so scared.

Mmmm… off to sing and think of him. *sighhh*

I am now dating the Grade 12 in question. I love him love him love him. And also, this proves JUST HOW LONG I’VE WANTED HIM. Yay me.

voice types

I have decided on what type of voice you need for a certain type of singing. I felt like making a list (featuring my friends that most of you probably don’t know).

For pop music, you need a smooth sort of voice. It can’t have too much vibrato, but it also can’t be too flat. My friends Robbie and Nikki have voices like this.

For musical theatre, you need to be loud. That’s pretty much it. Usually people with interesting voices fit here. My friend Ashley has a voice like this (the girl is LOUD).

For jazz, you need a sort of rough, low voice. This is the genre wherein you don’t have to be perfect and lovely. You can feel free to be raunchy and independent. I have a voice like this.

For rock, you can be grating. This is the only genre in which you don’t have to be a good singer. My friends Jeremy and Erica have voices like this.

For opera, you can be shrieky. Shrieky, lots of vibrato, and rich. My friend Laura has a voice like this (good GOD that girl is a soprano *death*).

For country, you need a twangy sort of feel, but you can be gentle and not harsh. In my opinion, the best country singers are not harsh, but are sort of soft and smooth. My friend Jamie-Lynn has a voice like this.

Aaaaaand if I think of any more I’ll let you know.